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A New Perspective

Dealing with a serious illness day in and day out puts things in a different perspective.  

“The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven..” 
― John Milton, Paradise Lost

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Help Wanted

5/16/2013

2 Comments

 
"I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love. "
                                                                                                                                                       ~Mother Teresa
PictureOur daughter, Corinne, has begun cooking for us!
From taking our first steps to riding a two-wheeler to driving a car, we grow up being applauded as we learn to do things all by ourselves.  I wonder if these accolades lead to that feeling of incompetence when we are unable to “do it all by ourselves”?  Maybe I am the only one who feels like she has to do it all and not depend on anyone else. 

My husband used to tell me that I intimidate people by how much I routinely get accomplished in a day.  Prior to his illness, I could be relied upon to be organized and punctual, knocking out my entire to-do list consistently each day.  Now things are different.  I am rarely on time to anything and I can’t even seem to organize a family dinner.  I tried up until recently to do it all myself and found my to-do list just seemed to grow with each day I got through. 

Perhaps you have seen the video on Akhil’s May 13th post and you have a better understanding of what it is like to take care of someone who is disabled.  Imagine, on top of that, you have a house to keep up, three kids to have relationships with and all the other daily tasks of being a wife, mom and friend.  It was overwhelming.  Then some angels came one by one…

A sweet friend asked if we would appreciate meals.  At first, the “I can do it” attitude made me want to say, “Oh, that’s not necessary.”  Luckily, the stressed out and overwhelmed part of me triumphed and Melissa set up meals for us twice a week.  The meals have been such a blessing.  It is just one less thing I have to plan, organize, prepare and clean up!  I am so thankful to all of my wonderful friends (and some people who barely know us but who wanted to help) who have provided and continue to provide meals for us. 

Another wonderful friend suggested that she would come over once a week for a couple of hours to be with Akhil so I could go out and he could have some fun.  Lori has faithfully come to our home every Monday afternoon.  She taught Akhil to play cribbage - and - how to lose gracefully!  He has been blessed by her visits, prayers and the conversation.

Dear Dawna practices reflexology and she generously offered her services to Akhil.  She has been treating Akhil to reflexology pampering every week.  He feels so good after each of her visits.  She has blessed him with her time and touch.

Most recently, some angels came within the last couple of weeks as they stepped forward willing to assist with Akhil’s daily care.  Mark, Scott and Bob have been such a blessing to me and Akhil by giving me the opportunity to temporarily step out of the role of caregiver and back into the roles of wife and mother. 

What I know for sure is that I cannot do it all.  I am so thankful God put all these people in our lives to show me that I don’t have to.


2 Comments
Lori
5/16/2013 11:36:05 am

You are always so gracious! I am the one blessed to spend time with each of you. It has been such a joy to walk along side your family on this journey. You constantly teach me new things, all I have to do is show up. Thank you for letting me share this time with you.

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Patty Watkinson
5/21/2013 11:47:07 pm

You're posts are always so informative and encouraging Laura ... You tell it like it is with raw emotion and truth about your marriage, family life, God's sovereignty and love, His ultimate plans for us, etc, etc. Your courage and honesty is refreshing and comforting ... Apparently you're doing more than you think you are and touching many lives in the process :-) Keeping you all in prayer ... including your "Angels" :-) Love you All !!

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    Laura Jhaveri

    Wife and mother coping with the daily struggles caring for a family with a serious affliction.

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