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What I've Learned

2/10/2014

10 Comments

 
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A friend of mine asked me,"What has ALS taught you?" That is an interesting question. So I asked her, "Why do you want to know?" And she answered, "ALS is a very difficult struggle and you are a very wise man.  Anything that you have learned will benefit others."

I was humbled by her response. And it took me a few days to come up with an answer.  Hopefully my answer will enlighten some of you and inspire the rest of you.  

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The first thing that I learned is that ALS is a very cruel disease. It has progressively taken my abilities away. What I can do today I might not be able to do tomorrow. And I know the ending, I will be left with the ability to only move my eyes and nothing else.  Soon afterwards my lungs will stop functioning and I will suffocate. It's quite a picture to look forward to.

The second thing that I have learned is that I am not the only one suffering. This disease has hit our whole family. My wife and I had plans that we will not be able to do now.  My children used to look at me as their provider but not anymore. Devastating.  I can see in my children's eyes the disillusionment and it will leave a mark for life.

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Are you depressed yet? I know that I am. 

As I explained this to my friend, she asked me, "If you have all this in your head, why are you always so happy?" Finally she asked the right question! What ALS has really taught me is to stay in the moment. And let me explain how.  It is very dangerous to let my mind go into the past and think about all the things that I was able to do.  And it is even worse, to project myself into the future and imagine what is going to happen to my body. So that leaves me in the only place that is left: the present. That is the secret to my happiness. 

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I have also learned what is important and what is trivial. By the way, most of what I used to think about is trivial.  The only things that matter now are relationships with my family, friends and God.  (And not necessarily in that order).

The key to my happiness and your happiness is the ability to discipline the mind. I have a choice to make, I can choose to dwell on the negative or simply appreciate what I have right now. Let me elaborate. If three months from now I lose the ability to speak and even move my legs, I would give everything to have that ability back. I would be happy with that. And guess what, I have that ability right now so I am happy.  And that is what it means to live in the moment. 

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The final thing that I have learned is that everyone is watching me, from my children to my neighbors.  They are all rooting me on and seeing how I handle life.  Almost saying, "If he can do it, I can do it." That was quite a realization for me. I am representing Christ in my struggle. Am I going to be faithful or am I going to lay down and give up. What about you? How many people are watching you? You might be surprised.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Philippians 4:13

10 Comments
Jason Christensen
2/10/2014 10:10:44 am

You are a constant motivation to me. I find through your most encouraging and inspiring words that I find strength to fight my personal battles. You are truly an amazing man and a true follower of our Lord, Jesus Christ. You are now and forever will be a great inspiration to me.

Reply
Melissa Kolb
2/11/2014 12:06:52 am

"Everyone is watching me" is a humbling thought as just these last few days I have allowed my circumstances to put me in a funk. Thank you for the reminder that we are always portraying Christ to others in whatever we go through...Peace & Love to you & your wife & daughters!

Reply
Susan
2/11/2014 05:42:36 am

I am humbled and painfully aware of the little things I make into mountains! Thank you, once again, Akhil for opening my eyes to what is truly important in this life! I love you guys!

Reply
Phil link
2/11/2014 06:39:56 am

Thanks again for an inspiring blog. Also having ALS/MND your lighting the path for myself and others I'm sure.

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Cecelia
2/11/2014 01:46:18 pm

Akhil, you are so wise and so inspiring to everyone that is blessed to be able to spend time with you. I miss you and will see you soon! Love to you, Laura and Jordan!

Reply
Mike Dobbs
2/13/2014 02:34:36 pm

Living in the present! Yes. Appreciating each day one at a time is key. I love you for the lighthouse for God that you have been and continue to be Akhil.

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Malia
2/13/2014 04:01:48 pm

Cannot express enough, how The Lord uses you to impact the lives of others. You make a difference Akhil and you always have. That will NEVER change!

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Claudine Finger link
2/13/2014 11:24:29 pm

I am humbled by your strength .....and touched by your excessive strugle! You are an inspiration to my faith, and praise God for you!

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Susie Smith (a friend of Sandy Pedroza) link
2/14/2014 07:46:43 pm

I know your faith has already impacted Sandy. Praying for the presence of Jesus always on your journey!

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Lynn Devereux
8/16/2017 05:43:20 pm

AMEN

Reply



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    The video is Akhil's journey with ALS.  Painful to see but the faith his family shows is uplifting.
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    God continues to show his love for us through his people.  Thank you to everyone who has reached out to us, prayed for us, visited Akhil, brought us a meal and served us however God led you to serve.  Continue to follow those urgings from God in serving those who are struggling.

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    Akhil and Laura Jhaveri

    Applying the skills they've learned in over 20 years of marriage, this couple faces the challenges of ALS together. MND or motor neuron disease is deadly with no known cure.  The Jhaveri family has to endure this battle and show the world God's love!

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