After the struggle ended (Laura helped me!) I was checking my email when I got a timely video from my daughter Ashley. She covered a song with her friend Luke. As I listened to the words, they made me think of something ... SAD and GOOD!
The song: Pocket Full of Sunshine by Natasha Bedingfield
The words that caught my attention:
Take me away, a secret place
A sweet escape, take me away
Take me away to better days
Take me away, a hiding place
There's a place that I go that nobody knows
Where the rivers flow and I call it home
And there's no more lies in the darkness; there's light
And nobody cries, there's only butterflies
Sometimes, actually all the time, I wish I could go to a "secret place" and enjoy better days.
A place where nobody cries, there's only butterflies.
Then the tears came. Reality hit. My body is withering away. There are no butterflies.
I saw my youngest, Jordan. I wondered if I would be able to celebrate her 13th birthday with her?
Who will take care of her?
Why is this happenning?
The good: The lines that pulled me out of my spiral
The sun is on my side
And takes me for a ride
I smile up to the sky,
I know I'll be alright
The son, Jesus, He is on my side and He takes me for a ride. I am on the ride of a lifetime.
I smile, look up and KNOW I will be alright because only good things wait for me.
Why do I know?
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." - Romans 8:28
Enjoy her singing and be uplifted by the closing verse.