I usually write a blog with a message that I received from above. I have all week to think about it.  Monday, Lori comes over and we put my thoughts on the computer.  I have heard from many of you and you are very happy with the content. 

This week is going to be a little different. This week I want to have you write the blog! I am going to do it by asking questions of you. 

These are questions that are very important to me and anyone who has a very challenging situation. When I say challenging, I mean terminal. 

The answers you leave in the comments will be fuel for my next week's blog.

Question number 1: Do you think God exists?

I fully believe that He does simply based on what I see around me. I mean If I saw six dice all in a perfect row in consecutive order, I would believe that someone put them that way. I would not believe that they fell in order randomly. With that said, I look at the details of an eye, for instance, and I know that it was created by an intelligent being. But in any case, do YOU think God exists?

Question number 2: Do you believe that Jesus is the only way to God, why?

You cannot use the Bible in your reasoning. If you use the Bible, it will employ circular logic. Let me explain. If I write a book and tell everyone that I am the smartest person in the world and I state that others will disagree.  When other people disagree you cannot say, "Aha, Akhil wrote that in his book!" That is circular logic. That is why you cannot use the Bible to support your reasoning. 

Question number 3: If heaven is a wonderful place, what is the point of struggling here?


This question becomes extremely important when you are progressively declining. Trust me, those of you who have this situation have asked this question. Maybe even if you don't have a progressively declining situation but  things suck, you might have asked this question.


And that is it. Think about these three questions, ask them of your friends and family. Leave me a comment or two. I really need help with these questions. I will take your comments to heart.

"Congratulations! You are our youngest graduate from this High School. " I heard those words when I was 15 years old. Three months later I started college.  Four years later at 19, I had my Electrical Engineering Degree. Three months later, I got my first job as an engineer for General Motors! I was in control.  Ha ha! 

I was caught in the illusion.

Fast forward about 30 years.

“Akhil, unfortunately after all my testing I have news for you. You have ALS.”  I heard those words on July 28, 2011. I immediately dismissed it. I felt fine, just some twitching in my left arm. Nonetheless, I researched ALS and what it would do to me if I actually had it, WHICH I DID NOT!

As I read, I could not believe what ALS does to a person. It read like a nightmare, unbelievable!

Three years and two months later, I am living the nightmare. Ever have a dream where you cannot move and the monster is coming to get you?

In my life when I open my eyes as I awake, ALS is coming after me and I literally cannot move! Like I said, I am living the nightmare.

Below is a video of what every morning looks like for me.

If you know me, you know I’m a type A personality. Always on the go and completely independent. The other day my cell phone rang, my caller ID said it was my Mom.

 I could see the phone, it was inches from my fingertips but I could not answer the phone because my hands have stopped working. Also my fingers don’t move at all.

Maddening!


 Imagine the frustration, the rage, the depths of depression I am constantly battling. What am I supposed to do? How do I keep from going insane? How do I stop the demons from destroying my soul?

I am reminded of a story.  There was a young sailor on an old time clipper ship. The seas began to rage and the crew was afraid that the ship would hit some rocks. So the captain told him to climb up to the crow's nest to scout for land. The sailor thought that the movement while on the mast would make him fall. The captain, noticing that the sailor was struggling, told him to look up to the sky. When the young man changed his focus from the sea to the sky,  he was able to make it up to the crow's nest without a problem.

 Why is this story important? It show us that when we are struggling, we are focused on the problem. And remember, what we focus on grows large. Instead of looking at the problem, look upward for the solution.

There’s only one thing I know to do. Run to my Savior and ask him to quiet my soul. Then He reminds me of what He has done for me. He reminds me that I have won!


With that said, my oldest daughter Ashley has given me a gift with her voice. That is the gift I am sharing with you.  Really listen to the words as they are very powerful.

"Savior I come, quiet my soul." Imagine that you can run to your Savior and He will give you rest. Suddenly you realize you have true control, not the illusion.

Enjoy this four minute video that should make you smile!

Ever notice how some people are very easily offended? It doesn't take much to set these people off. Tiring!

Oops, am I talking about you?

I don't mean to step on toes. I am sure that if it is not you, you know someone that fits the description. I know that you are thinking about them right now. What a special thing! ;-)

The real question is, how do you stop from having this kind-of attitude? Don't get me wrong, everyone has this feeling every once in a while.  The key is not to be characterized as a person with a sour attitude, like the person you were thinking about.

The only way to prevent this attitude is to put up walls. Stick 'em up! Let me explain. . . 

You have to ask yourself why you get upset. Usually it is something that you were not expecting.  If you were expecting it, you would not have been upset by it. It might cause you some momentary anguish, but you move on.  Why? Because you anticipated it.

So let me forewarn you about four different types of people that are in your life. Knowing the right categories to put these people in will help you anticipate what they will do. Like I just said, anticipation is the key from being offended.

Category 1: People who will never like you. Try as you may, they will never come around. By the way, I have spent many, many hours trying to get some people to like me by doing all sorts of things for them. In the end, it was all wasted effort.

Category 2: People who don't like you but can be persuaded to like you.

Category 3: People who like you but can be persuaded not to like you.

Category 4: People who will always like you no matter what. Anyone come to mind?
 

It is very important to develop relationships with all your Category 4 people.  At the same time don't wast your energy on your Category 1 goats, I mean gifts. They are gifts  because they help you focus your energy elsewhere.

You only have so much emotional energy. Spend it like you spend your money, wisely.

One of the things that I was guilty of was listening to gossip. My assistant would come to me in the morning and share all the gossip about me. She would tell me all the details of why some one didn't like me.  Foolishly, I would listen and try  to fix the situation. 

Two errors: I was dealing with  a Category 1 person (they will never like me) and I listened to all the details.  Worse, I let the gossip enter my spirit and owned it. This is a perfect formula  to not only get offended but to stay that way. 

Once I realized my mistakes, I stopped. First of all, I realized that this "gift" allowed me to not worry about the situation.  Second, I stopped listening to the details. I told my assistant to give me the Cliff Note version. In other words, I didn't need to hear all of that and more importantly, I didn't need to own it.

I know it might sound like a very small thing, however, this small change really helped me. I put walls up to protect my spirit.

Another thing I realized was that I was giving power to people who would never like me.  Power that was draining my emotional energy. Instead of coming home ready to put my energy into my family, I would come home drained and hide in my cave. Pathetic!

No more, now I spend my energy wisely, just in time.  Having ALS is helping me focus how I spend my limited energy. Should I spend it on activities that help no one or should I spend it helping?

So here is what I am doing. I surround myself with Category 4 people and see how I can build the relationship. Gone are the days when I spent time worrying about gossip .I think about all of the days that I wasted my emotional energy when I could have been helping others. Whenever you meet me now, you will see a smile on my face and it surprises many people.

Well now you know my secret. I don't give my power away to anyone. I hope that you don't either! 

What is your metaphor for your life? Why do you need one?

I have taught many classes and have asked those questions. Some people have answered that life is a merry-go-round, you go around and around but end up in the same place. Other people have said that life is an escalator. Sometimes you go up and sometimes you go down, but you are always moving.  Others have said life is a game of chance . There are winners and losers. It is all the luck of the draw.

Why do you need a metaphor for life? Your metaphor will determine how you respond to the circumstances of your life.  For instance, if you belief life is a game of chance, you are simply a victim.  If your life is a merry-go-round, you might be having fun but no matter what you do, nothing will change. You get the idea, your metaphor determines your response. 

My students asked me, "What is your metaphor?"  I actually have three of them: life is a test, life is a trial, and most importantly, life is temporary.

These metaphors are how I am able to live with my ALS. You might be wondering how my metaphors help me. Also you might be wondering how they are going to help you. 

As you know, ALS is horrible! I have lost all control and I am very dependent on other people. Other people do the most basic things for me. How can anyone who is as independent as I was, survive? 

The answer: my metaphors! Since I know that life is a test. I realize that ALS tests my perseverance. I know that life is a trial; therefore, everyone has to go through something. I am not unique, so I am not alone. You might not have ALS but you might have some other trial that is challenging you.  

Most importantly, I know that life is temporary. I know that I can endure anything because eventually it will end. For example, imagine you are at a concert with fifth graders who are tone deaf. Yet they are belting out Christmas Carols at the top of their voices. Excruciating! You can make it through because you know that there is an end.

I am able to survive my ALS because I know it will end. Either I will be healed by God or I will be with God. Either way, I win! 

Now you see how my metaphors help me in all my circumstances. I believe that if you employ my philosophy in your life, you will have the same winning attitude. 

The question for you: what is your metaphor?

Please leave me a comment because I want to know if I have made you think about your life a little differently.  I was inspired to write this blog because someone out there needs to hear it. I don't know who it is but I am being obedient to the voice in my mind.